What is a grown-up (and do I want to be one)?

Grown-ups in action

Grown-ups! They’re calm and responsible and always have a tissue to hand. They can smell a loose roof tile at 40 paces. Grown-ups! They learn from their mistakes and offer sage advice upon which they themselves would act. They know how to talk to the headteacher. These guys keep their shit together big time. No…… Continue reading What is a grown-up (and do I want to be one)?

Learning is fun (but it turns out I’m stupid)

I love learning stuff with Maya. We read and watch and look things up and experiment together. I’m reacquainting myself with some genuinely interesting topics. But all this revision’s been highlighting some pretty big gaps in my knowledge, some of which I’m not at all willing to alert her to. I was prepared to admit I’d never heard…… Continue reading Learning is fun (but it turns out I’m stupid)

Radio silence and the power of lego

Hello again Back in October, I gave some friends and nursery mums the link to this blog. I was terrified because I am an enormous wimp. I’m not sure what dark and dreadful things I thought would come to pass if people I knew read my writing. But my fears were ridiculous. Nobody blanked me at preschool pickup or posted a…… Continue reading Radio silence and the power of lego

Twenty things I lose it with because I can’t lose it with my child

Sometimes I do grown-up tantrums. Things get kicked and swiped and I do a little stamp dance. Nobody gets hurt. But still. I’m not proud. I guess at the root of it are significant issues: stress, lack of time for myself and stuff in my life that isn’t quite right at the moment. Like how work…… Continue reading Twenty things I lose it with because I can’t lose it with my child

You lovely undisgustable thing

Maya is hard to disgust. It’s another one I think she got from her mum. I am mildly disgusting myself and I guess she assumes I’m normal. My own disgust mechanism is a bit faulty. I’m not a big fan of blood and gore. I don’t like documentaries where chimps eat monkeys and even thinking about…… Continue reading You lovely undisgustable thing

Leading by shoddy example

This cool post by Jess at Wonderoak got me thinking about the things I’ve taught my own daughter without meaning to. Maya thinks and does all manner of stuff that I’m pretty sure she picked up from me when my guard was down (any time outside enthusiastic coffee hour). It’s textbook copycat business. Here is some of her wonky and…… Continue reading Leading by shoddy example

Why didn’t you tell me I had a moustache?

This morning, the bathroom mirror informed me that I had a moustache. ‘Yeah, you’ve got a moustache, man. You’ve had it for ages,’ it said. Eeeew. I haven’t noticed people sneaking glances at my upper lip mid-chat. But there it was. They must’ve been wrestling their instincts to the ground: ‘Look at her moustache!’ ‘I’m not looking, you mean bastard.’…… Continue reading Why didn’t you tell me I had a moustache?

Thank you for the art, Paul (a note to my incredible brother)

Dear Paul, I’ve just rediscovered painting and I love it. I never had your talent or your instinctive artist’s eye. But I watched you and learned the basics and what you could do inspired me. Without you, I might still have drawn that shoe made of dots with a 2B pencil under Miss Leigh’s tutelage. I would have had a good crack at…… Continue reading Thank you for the art, Paul (a note to my incredible brother)

My daughter is a grubby little soap dodger (and I think she gets it from me)

Not for me, thanks

How often does a four year old need to wash? More often than my daughter, I’d imagine. Maya does not like getting clean. She used to look forward to baths. Showers were a real novelty for about a week. And then, all of a sudden, the love affair ended and Maya and hygiene went their separate ways. I realised…… Continue reading My daughter is a grubby little soap dodger (and I think she gets it from me)

I wear what my four year old tells me to

I never needed fashion advice until Maya came along and messed up my body. I knew what I liked and I wore it. Nothing made me lose respect for a man faster than seeing him wait patiently outside the changing rooms while his needy girlfriend tried on another ensemble for his nervous appraisal. Did he have nothing better to do? What…… Continue reading I wear what my four year old tells me to